When the Judged Become the Judgmental

If you make choices that go against the grain of what most people are doing around you, you are going to stick out. You may be on the receiving end of criticisms. People may think you are wrong for doing the things you do. Your choices get questioned more. Having made a few unconventional choices in life myself, I get that it can be annoying. In an ideal world, people would mind their own business and keep their opinions to themselves. They would be more open-minded and accepting of different choices and ways of living. It can kind of create a you against the world mentality that unfortunately, can make you behave in the exact same manner.

You will probably be tempted to judge other people right back. A funny trend I notice about a lot of unconventional people who tend to be on the receiving end of frequent judgment is how judgmental they are. Constantly being judged can definitely be wearing and unless you are someone who has a level of confidence that permeates every fiber of your being, it will probably get to you sometimes. I definitely understand what prompts the behavior, but when we identify what is at the core of it -- our own insecurity -- we realize it is our problem and no one else's.

A lot of people deemed ''unconventional'' often hold great contempt for anything conventional. They mock people who live the average existence of a 9 to 5 job and a couple of kids. They think these sorts of people are all conformist sheep who secretly hate life and wish they could be more like them. Sure, some people may feel that way, but some may actually be very happy with that type of life. If that life is not for you, then it is good you did not go that route, but why the need to bash people who did? Why do you need to assume they are all miserable? Do you feel superior to them?

If you are someone living on the fringe in one way or another, I ask you to really think about what I have said in this post. Do you have a tendency to be just as judgmental about other people's lives as others are about yours? If so, examine that more deeply to see where that stems from. Is it possible you are still harboring some insecurities about your own choices, even if you know they are the right ones for you? Exploring this more may be uncomfortable, but well worth it because it will bring a greater sense of peace to your life. You will feel more confident about your choices and you will expend less energy trying to convince yourself you are better than the people unfairly judging you. In some ways, you very well may be, but it will not matter anymore.


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